"Sleep with a hundred girls to fall in love with one.
Have an awesome time and make it worth it, even if it ends in a disaster.
Facefuck her, cum in her ass then cuddle, go to sleep and make her a breakfast."
This is what I wrote on Twitter a while ago. It could be considered a "Romantic Red Pill Manifesto" as it was the first time I used the term. So yeah, hello to everyone out there in this "Romantic Red Pill" community.
Many of you were asking me what I agree and disagree with when it comes to the Red Pill. Where do I even start?
The Red Pill
I'm sure you all know what Red Pill is but there are still a lot of misconceptions. For many guys The Red Pill is the name of a subforum on Reddit which tagline is "Discussion of sexual strategy in a culture increasingly lacking a positive identity for men." That is of course only a part of the story.
The Red Pill is seen as a bitter truth and awakening. Just as Neo was brutally awakened in The Matrix movie, you too can suddenly become aware of certain dynamics playing out between males and females. Of course, it is more convenient to stay Blue Pill and believe what everyone wants you to believe, even if you see the signs that it is not true. However, the risks associated with that approach are massive.
If you are unaware that you're playing a game, you don't know any of the rules, and on top of that other players know them then your chances of losing are immense. This can mean anything from being unhappy in a sexless relationship through your partner cheating on you to losing most of your wealth and dignity in a nasty divorce.
The Red Pill is about both the understanding and the acceptance of real male-female dynamics. It does not matter how counterintuitive, socially unacceptable or ugly they might be. If it can be confirmed by observations and experiments, it is true. And it doesn't matter how much you would like it to be false.
Once you start to see everything differently, you just cannot blindly accept social conventions and follow the crowd. If you do not replace one narrative (mainstream) with another (Red Pill), you will start to think for yourself.
PUAs & The Red Pill
While "redpillers" might be the theoreticians and scientists behind sexual strategies and intergender dynamics, the PUA-s (Pick Up Artists) are the researchers working in the trenches and gathering valuable intelligence. Everyone is an empiricist in the sense that they build theories based on what they see, not what they wish was true.
The biggest difference between everyone Red Pill and the rest of the world is that the former do not try to build artificial social conventions based on wishful thinking. It is a strictly empirical approach - they discover the rules by observing and experiencing. And yes, testing them.
It would be great if you could be a nice guy and get a faithful, loving and hot girlfriend without any need for self-improvement, raising one's value, holding frame, passing shit-tests and what else. But this is not the world we're living in and unfortunately all the evidence is to the contrary. Nice guy finish last (or not at all).
Unfortunately, the observed interactions and the relationship dynamics that unfold every day before our very own eyes largely support the Red Pill point of view. You might say that it is confirmation bias but once you start looking through the Red Pill lenses, you can make accurate predictions even about Blue Pill relationships.
So, if your predictions turn out to be valid, then the underlying theory must have some validity as well.
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The Romantic Red Pill
It is not a shocking fact that a lot of PUA-s are guys who were "nice guys" in the past. They had some successes but ended up frustrated either about their options or about the dating market in general. They welcome both the PUA advice telling them "how" and the Red Pill telling them "why".
At the same time, a lot of them are deliberately sabotaging all of their more serious relationships that inevitably form in their life. Some do not want to be "locked down", others are afraid that everything Red Pill told them is going to happen. They think there are no girls good enough to even consider going out for an expensive dinner with one, let alone traveling together.
I was like that. I had a total of two relationships in my life when I discovered daygame and I thought I was never going to be in another serious relationship ever again. Period.
The thing is, if you like affection, you will not get that in one night stands and even short term relationships. You absolutely have to have common experiences and a lot of quality time spent together. There is also trust component and much, much more.
After sleeping with n girls (n being different for every guy) you just want to try something different. Some guys start to travel the world and collect flags, others go for faster and more extreme sex, there are guys who chase "younger, hotter and tighter" and some by mere luck find one of the girls they're compatible with and they say "what the hell, let's try being in love".
"Romantic Red Pillers" use all the knowledge and experience they gained to form long-lasting, sometimes even monogamous relationships. Not in a naive way - they know it might end suddenly. But they also know a) what to do to minimize that chance b) they choose the girls carefully c) they are prepared in case everything falls apart.
AWALT And Hypergamy Nonsense
Purple Pill is the name for watered-down Red Pill theories that are designed to appeal to the general audience. Some sleazy guys extend either pretend that there are significant exceptions or they paint the rules as less definite. In both cases, they are trying to win over some people who will not listen to the strict (and true) set of rules.
That is just lying to others and to yourself. Most of the theories do not need to be watered down for anyone. At the same time, you have to be very careful about taking the Red Pill because it might leave you bitter and hating women. Remember that anecdotal evidence is not evidence. And just because some guy on the Internet posts ten real-life examples of hypergamy, "feminine imperative" and AWALT per day that does not mean every girl will cheat on you.
Hypergamy is the notion that the girl will always go for the partner of higher status/value than she is. Red Pill extends that to explain the concept of "branch-swinging". The girl will trade her current partner if there is more attractive (or higher status/value) man available and the potential downside for her is acceptable.
But that "acceptable potential downside" nuance is extremely important. The "delta" that makes her trade her current partner differs from girl to girl. For one it is "he has a better car". For another "he is more masculine and adores me more" will not be enough. And there are some women for whom that delta is so high, that they will never find a guy who is that much better.
The same things goes for potential downside. For one girl is "to hell with it" and she will cheat with a guy in a club's bathroom, even if it means losing her money, lifestyle, house, etc. But there are some that won't even look at other men if they are in relationship.
"All Women Are Like That" (AWALT) is also a generalization. It means all women can behave in a certain way (cheat, be vain, use you for your money, branch-swing). There are, however, different thresholds for this behavior. If you consider a girl that has a history of cheating and she did take part in gangbangs in the past then she is more "AWALT" than the one who has been faithful to her last two boyfriends, each of 5 years.
But of course she can still "be like that". You can meet her after her 2nd boyfriend cheated on her and she would just want to see what's is like to sleep with a random guy. Congratulations, that is one of the types that PUAs have a lot of success with. She will also probably feel bad about it and never do it again. But to some, it's just one more piece of anecdotal evidence that supports "AWALT".
Carefully vet girls if you plan on having anything more than a fling. Learn about red flags and learn from your experience. In time, you will see the true nature of women for yourself and you'll be able to filter them properly.
And don't let anyone tell you that being in a serious relationship is wrong. It isn't. Just like sleeping with a different girl every month or week isn't wrong.
The only "wrong" thing here is making uninformed decisions. Not knowing about hypergamy, AWALT and Red Pill and "hoping for the best".
Not knowing the rules of the game you unwittingly play really can kill you.