Future Projections

Beta guy in a sweater advancing on a girl who hates him.

How much of the association between a girl and a guy is due to the future projections? Guy is telling her adventure stories and is promising her all kinds of experiences and the girl of course responds in kind with her promises of having sex with him and taking part in such shenanigans.


Future Projections

I wrote about assumption stories before. It might seem that adventure stories are similar but they’re not. The former are just elaborate assumptions. They might be placed in the future but they are still just about the girl and are in fact guesses that serve the purpose of learning more about her.

Future projections are stories that include both you and the girl in a way that she’ll believe you two have a future together. It is one of the ways you’re going to frame the relationship and avoid the fate of being her orbiter. You want to push the idea of you two being lovers… somewhere in the future.

Future projection is a semi-unreal activity placed in an unspecified time that you and the girl are going to do together. Maybe. Sometime. If she puts out.

If you do them wrong you can end up projecting kids, dogs and cottage at the sea or – even worse – all the fun things you’re going to do… as friends. Guys really do friendzone themselves and they do that either by not escalating or by presenting themselves as boyfriend material. And boyfriends don’t get sex until “it’s time“. So do not come up with romantic stories or chivalrous ideas.

Beta guy in a sweater advancing on a girl who hates him.

Do you know what is the sweater made of? Boyfriend material.


Spike Things Up

The key to future projections is that they really have to be detailed adventure stories. Girls love details. The more images you’re able to produce the more likely one is going to stick. And it will become kind of an earworm that will remind her of you every time she remembers about that thing.

“That thing” can be anything – from going to a shooting range through an idea of working out together at the gym to a weekend getaway to Barcelona. Make it a running joke. Make her confused – she should fully believe you two are eventually going to do it but she won’t know when. And it will drive her crazy.

Do not focus on the grand plans. Something as trivial as drinking wine at the city beach or going for the best cocktails in town has one single advantage – you can use it to plan the next date. If you make a simple future projection and then act on it on the next date then she’ll be more likely to believe even the crazy ones.


Follow Up

Once you’re sleeping with the girl there will be some expectations. If you’ve talked about traveling the world and the farthest you’ve been is the bar next to your place then she’ll rightfully become disappointed. So maybe telling her adventure stories about how you two are going to end up on Mars isn’t such a great idea.

One thing you can bet on – she won’t forget any of your promises.

Girls are drawn to your persona and stay because they can take part in your life. For some it could mean wild sex every time you meet (future project kinky, wild stuff) while others will pay in kind for all the crazy things you’re going to do together outside the bed (future project a weekend getaway somewhere nearby).

If the adventure in question is going to be exciting for you no matter what (like, I don’t know, a sailing trip) – even better. That only reinforces your position as the guy who’s sharing his exciting live with her. And that makes her the lucky one to be in this relationship.

It doesn’t have to be a weekend escape or a foreign travel but if you put in her head the idea of you two cooking a meal together then you’d better buy that apron. If you’re tempting her with a motorbike trip, get that second helmet for her. I’m not saying she’ll leave you if you don’t (although she might if you fail to deliver anything) but she’ll be more likely to reciprocate if you do.


Male-female relationships commentator. Also a traveler, adrenaline junkie and, believe it or not, introvert. Still obsessed with working out, coaching daygame and living life to the full.

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