It’s Not (Always) Your Fault

Super hot chick on the streets of Kiev.

Two approaches, one girl. We’ve all been there but this time it was something totally different. I unknowingly approached the same chick one day after my first try. And what happened got me blown away. Not because it was so good but because it was so different.


First Approach

On my way from the gym I noticed a really nice girl standing on the side of the street. She looked a little bit stressed but as I looked back and realized she had great legs I decided that it doesn’t matter that I’m still in my gym clothes. I’m going to do it.

On her arm she had something that resembled a fishing rods bag so I went with my usual opener and that joke. She wasn’t impressed at all and I could tell she didn’t want to talk to me. I wished her a good day and went my way.

And that’s that, right?


Second Approach

Same street, same time, next day. I was going back from the gym. My mood was great as it always is after a heavy workout. I noticed a hot chick standing on the side of the street, looking and smiling at me whilst talking on the phone. Okay, that could be an IOI. I look back and she’s still smiling so I decided to open her.

These girls are like chameleons. She was dressed in different clothes and looked like a different chick. The vibe was different as well but as it turned out it was the same girl.

Thankfully I didn’t use my standard opener as she quickly explained that we’ve seen each other on the previous day. This time the conversation was super fun and lighthearted. I’d say too much rapport, not enough attraction but she did know why I tried to talk to her yesterday.

Super hot chick on the streets of Kiev.

That… That… I can’t lie to you. That is not the girl.

Number close was the most natural thing to do. I wasn’t just some random stranger who approached her, we talked for a long while and learned few things about each other, she could be sure that I’m living in the same area and you’re usually not working out every day if you’re on a short trip (even though I do) so I’m not in this for just a weekend.


The Date

You might wonder what the rest of this story is. I’m first to admit that this lead was rather lukewarm. I don’t know how it is going to end but I may guarantee that she’s not a flake. I have already been on a first date with her.

Kiev is slow. Do not expect fast pulls and crazy stories (although they do happen). Most girls will want to see you few times before they let themselves go.

First part of the date was very similar to the first approach and the rest was very much like the second one. We started slow by having a drink and something to eat. It took us a long time and we did a ton of rapport. But it was too boring so I told her to leave the unfinished drink there and we moved on.

In the second venue we played the question game in my successful attempt to sexualize the conversation. Sometimes all you need to do is to introduce topics like dating, relationships and sex and the girl starts to think the right way. When it started to get hot (and late) I cut the date short to ensure it will be a good memory.

And that was it… so far.


It’s Not (Always) Your Fault

It’s easy to think that you’re in full control of the interaction and when a girl rejects you, she really rejects the approach. That is very often the truth. But not always.

Sometimes she has a bad day, you have a different vibe, she is otherwise occupied and can’t even be bothered. I’m not saying that you should approach the same girl again like I did. I’m merely saying that there’s no point in beating yourself up about every single rejection.

Unless, of course, you fucked something up.


Daygamer, traveler, adrenaline junkie. Obssessed with working out, coaching daygame and living life to the full.

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below 9 comments
: - 2017-06-27

> She looked a little bit stressed but […] I’m going to do it

So it WAS your fault after all

    tddaygame - 2017-06-27

    You might as well think that. Sometimes a girl looks stressed/bitchy but lights up when you approach her. You can’t be sure until you talk to her.

    1111 - 2017-06-29

    > You can’t be sure until you talk to her.

    Only if your intuition is underdeveloped

    tddaygame - 2017-06-29

    You can’t be sure. You might suspect something and you might usually be right. Still, you’ll be surprised every once in a while. When dealing with human beings there is no 100%.

: - 2017-06-29

Of course. However your emphasis on mass-spamming/shotgun approach creates really really really bad habits/expectations

Blowouts are supposed to be few-in-a-life-time events

    tddaygame - 2017-06-30

    Well then, come to Kiev. I’m here with quite famous guy from the German community (sharkk) and even he gets tons of those. It’s just the way it is here.

    agskor - 2017-07-01

    I’ve spent much time in Kiev in winter-spring 2013, but I don’t spam approach the way you do

    I’ve made a few very solid connection that were open to be taken by me, but I decided not to pull the trigger

    I’m a sniper – not a machine-gunner

    agskor - 2017-07-01

    The closest I did to what you daygamers do – spam approach that is – is immerse myself into the dancing scene in 2008-2010 in the Bay Area at Friday Night Blues/Shades of Blues including a dance camp in December 2008, a Portland Fusion Exchange in January 2009, and an Austin Dance Party in the summer of 2009 and quite a few Ecstatic Dances in Oakland attended – including a few open-air parties

    But the setting there is very different. As a good dancer, I was very quickly heavily social-proffed and did not have to start each and every approach from zilch. Blowouts were close to impossible to achieve and approach anxiety reared its head back then only in the beginning and only with women who taught dancing professionally – until I understood that my main contribution is passion and play – not technique and specific moves [which I did progress greatly on]

    I am kinda of curious of learning from you tho, because your way of being is so goddamn foreign to me and I like to widen my tools/repertoire

    Holla back at me!

    tddaygame - 2017-07-01

    Yet, you spam comments and e-mails.


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