Going back from a week spent sailing in Croatia my mind is focused on girls and daygame. Not because of some obsession but because I was on a boat with nothing but dudes. It’s was expected as it was a training cruise. The only pickup I could do there would be by accident.
Life gives you a lot of opportunities. It’s impossible to take all of them all the time but you have to create a habit of trying to use them. If you act more than stay passive you can achieve a lot. You can accomplish even more if you – also habitually – live your life in a way that creates endless opportunities all around you.
Know What You Want
You should know when you like a girl. If long, thin legs and slim girls give you a boner then you will notice them from far away and you should have no doubts as to whether you should approach or not. The same goes with facial features, the way she dresses and everything that you can guess at first sight.
You should also be honest with yourself. If you are into particular type of girls then don’t listen to others – go for them. At the same time, don’t ignore girls that you really, really want but for some weird reason you think they’re not for you. Go with your primal instincts as it makes everything easier in the long run.
If you have no idea what you like in a girl then make a list of features, write them down and carry that note with you. Whenever you’re in doubt – verify the list. I don’t think you’ll ever feel the need to – once written it becomes obvious.
Notice The Chances
You should know when a girl likes you. The signs are usually pretty clear and you’ve seen them many times. Even if she’s just a tease – you at least should notice that she’s inviting you for something. It’s your job to find out what it is.
I’m not only talking about IOIs – Indicators Of Interests – that the girls will display when they try to make you notice them. Those can be as subtle as longing looks or fine smiles. But there are more.
There are times when a girl gives you clear signs that she’s interested. You know them – she spends much more time around you that is expected for a given activity, she blatantly stares at you, she touches you a lot by accident, etc. You should be able to recognize those as what they are.
There aren’t that many socially acceptable ways for a girl to let someone know that she’s into him. Learn that not-so-secret language so you won’t be blind for the girls that actually fancy you but aren’t as open as to approaching you and expressing it overtly.
Take The Chances
Ahh, the good old leap of faith. When you notice any indicator of interest or even a faint suggestion that the girl might be into you – approach her immediately. It’s the first step into everything else.
Even if the girl is just okay, even if you did zero approaches that day – do something. For the sake of cultivating that habit and reinforcing your reflexes. Because you’re “that guy” who pick up all the girls around you.
Big problem with seasoned daygamers is that they tend to approach girls only in their familiar environment, on the streets, malls, bus stops or wherever you usually pick up girls. They are experts in noticing signs that a girl is interested in them and yet they fail to act when it happens outside their daygame watch.
Flirt with waitresses, cashiers and clerks. Get used to approaching all the girls that you like, whenever you notice them. You don’t have to “be daygaming”. You are a daygamer.
It’s always better to act and fail than to do nothing. Regret is always worse than failure. Create a habit of acting first and asking questions later. Your first instinct should be to open that girl, give yourself a chance, put the proverbial foot in the door.
Create The Chances
All that brings us back to my recent trip. Of course I did not went there with the goal of scoring a chick. I’m always prepared for the opportunities (condoms everywhere!) and I welcome them with open hand but sometimes there are none.
If you spend your whole life around other guys doing manly things and working hard on developing yourself then you will be disappointed with the number of girls that you will meet. Men’s and women’s interests differ greatly. Sometimes you won’t even see a single cool chick doing things that you fancy. Bummer.
Cool hobbies are great but they rarely draw the attention of girls. They like to listen about them for sure but not necessarily experience them firsthand. So never pick up a hobby to impress girls or to meet them via that activity. Do them for yourself, to live a better life.
Men and women are different. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
You have to create the chances. If you’re dead set on doing that “socially” then don’t get excited about activities that don’t guarantee you presence of girls that are approachable. And even if they do, you have to approach anytime you’ll find someone that you find attractive because it will still be uncommon.
Or just do whatever the hell you want socially and stick to daygame. That’s a valid strategy if you’re living in a big city. It’s an unlimited source of new, hot girls. If you want to have even more choices then combine those two. But never expect that you’ll get stable source of new leads outside some sort of “game” (day or night).
You have to both create and take your chances when it comes to pickup. Not only put yourself in a position to meet a lot of hot girls but also actually approach them. This is the difference between having something and nothing. Window of opportunity isn’t opened forever. Act.
How many hot and approachable girls I’ve seen during my recent trip? If you count a young girl on another boat with her parents seen on last day then one.