Field Report – The Worst Lay I’ve Ever Had
This is the story of the worst lay I’ve ever had from my daygame adventures. It was so bad that I’ve never contacted the girl again. Now that you know the ending let’s start as usual – with the approach.
The Lukewarm Approach
I’ve noticed an extraordinary legs and long black hair on a very slim girl and I reacted before I’ve had a chance to think this through. Up close I’ve realized she was both posh and young – a poisonous mixture to me. But she was old enough to be working her ass off. She was definitely available but I’ve had doubts about her being very much into me.
I’ve DHV-ed a little but not nearly enough as she was on the run. My spontaneous approach did most of the work for me as she was positively surprised by it. I’ve taken her number without a problem but I could see that few more minutes would make it much more solid.
Thinking too long before the approach strips you from raw desire and fills your head with doubts and excuses. “3 seconds rule” is okay but the best approaches are those where you’re just acting on a whim without any delay.
My note says that the girls was “almost an 8”, dreamy, no hobbies, an accountant, workaholic (taking work courses during the weekends) and probably a flake. I was right and wrong at the same time.
The Long Text Game
Texting was long. Too long. At first she responded very well, she was using a lot of smileys and wrote long text messages. So maybe it wouldn’t be a flake after all?
First date was set up quickly but the day before she said she can’t make it. It wasn’t an shameless flake but she also didn’t offer to reschedule. Mixed signals. This was going to be main theme with this girl.
Usually mixed signals means the girl is playing games with you. Either shit testing or trying to get another dick and keeping you as an orbiter. To verify – push for the date and gauge her reaction.
We didn’t manage to meet before my Carribean trip which changed two things. I’ve DHV-ed myself like crazy during that time but I’ve also been gone for almost 20 days. And when I came back it was that crazy time just before Christmas. So now the number was almost two months old.
With some problems we did manage to schedule a date just before the New Year’s Eve. Because I’ve been employing some of the good old radio silence around Christmas this time it seemed the date was solid. And it was.
The First Date
She texted me 15 minutes before the date that she’s already waiting which is usually a great sign. It was cold as hell so she definitely wasn’t comfortable when I arrived.
My notes turned out to be wrong, she was definitely more than an 8 but of course it could also be the power of makeup. She was very thin, thigh gap like I’ve never seen and legs longer than mine (despite her being shorter) – exactly what I like.
We’ve went straight to my usual second venue for “the best drinks in the city”. I feel like at home there, the bartenders know me (and probably facepalm every time I show up with a different girl) and I can joke with them while torturing girls with all the drink choices. She even asked if I know the guy behind the bar (“I don’t, I just like to joke with people” is my go-to answer).
We’ve sat down with our drinks and the date structure was pretty usual despite being in just one venue (she refused to change it mid-date). I’ve learned that few months ago she escaped her previous relationship and stormed off to Warsaw from a different city, leaving everything behind. That meant after grieving period she was back in the dating pool.
She was really hot (duh) and her past suggested she might be interesting. Not every girl in Poland lived abroad. While she was adventurous apparently she was always just an extra to her current boyfriend. And “being caring” was the number one quality she looked for in a man. Boring. No ambitions, no hobbies, even her job was just a happenstance.
My kiss attempts were turned down and not playfully enough to try to bounce her home. I’ve cut the date short and walked her to her bus stop. It was a fun evening but other than making her laugh many times I didn’t get far. Apparently she enjoyed our time together because we’ve stayed in touch without any issues.
The Second Date
Eight days later and without any problems whatsoever we saw each other on the second date. Once again she was earlier and once again – cold. Go figure.
This time I took her to a great wine bar near my place. This is the venue for quick bouncebacks as it’s just five minutes away. This time it was textbook – one glass of wine, “it’s getting louder in here, let’s grab a bottle and have it at my place” and off we went.
Back at my place it was once again pretty standard. No fireworks, no straight in-your-face primal desire but not a boring evening either. We had the wine, she was interested in the music I like to listen and play. My travels also were a hot topic.
Photos, videos and stories from foreign travels are one of the ultimate chick cracks.
We fooled around on bed and I thought it was going to be one of those lays where nothing is obvious but the sex still happens in the end. Of course I was wrong, otherwise it wouldn’t make an interesting story.
She stopped me before going “too far” few times when I realized she had her mind set on not having sex with me. That means she felt perfectly safe around me as she knew she wouldn’t give in.
So I played one of the oldest tricks in the book – “it’s late, if you promise to let me sleep you can stay here”. She agreed after token resistance, insisted on staying in her makeup and we went to sleep. I could make her wet easily and she had no problem with grabbing my dick but that’s about it. She was set on not having sex. Well, until morning.
The morning hasn’t changed a single thing. I tried, she enjoyed it right until she said no. It was futile. And I think she was enjoying it a bit too much.
I’ve made breakfast and went to the gym. On our way she wanted me to make a detour just to walk her to her bus stop that we both could see on the other side of the street. I’ve had better things to do.
The Third Date
Third date was arranged few days later as a dinner at my place. One of the good old “I cook, you bring wine” thing. I’ve also added that she should take her cosmetics with her as I’d appreciate her not whining about sleeping with her makeup on. She played along confirming that she’s going to stay for the night. That usually means an easy lay. Usually.
It got delayed by a week or so by her illness giving me more time to work on comfort. We’ve switched over from texting to Facebook so she’d feel more “safe”.
Some girls feel “safer” when they add you to their Facebook. Like you’re not going to disappear with just a single click.
On the day of the date I’ve picked her up from the bus stop and we’ve walked to my apartment. The dinner was pretty standard with me cooking and her watching. However, she was very bad at helping me in the kitchen. Most girls usually like to be of some use. She wasn’t.
She suggested eating at a big long table which of course I jokingly turned into a scene from movies where there’s a couple on the opposite ends of a too long table. We’ve even lighted a lonely candle to complete the joke. Dinner was fun.
Then we watched some YouTube videos once again talking about music, moved to my bed, fooled around and she once again managed to stop all my advances. Okay, so we’re going to “sleep”.
She took her makeup off which made her nervous and insecure (for no good reason but girls will be girls). She was also ashamed by her small boobs. Like I would expect big tits on a girl that thin.
Unfortunately, once again she stopped every single time we came to almost having sex. It wasn’t one of those “two steps forward, one step back” things. We were in one place and she refused to go any further. Let’s say the biggest victory was getting her out of her panties. Damn.
It took me a visit to the bathroom to rethink. Just going to sleep probably would mean another failure. Trying to turn her on was pointless – she was already turned on but also a self-control freak. I calmed down, laid next to her and just stayed like that.
We didn’t say anything and we didn’t go to sleep. We were just feeling our bodies and ever so slightly touching each other for I don’t know how long. I could see and feel her being massively horny and wet. I took the chance, came closer to her and tried to enter her. This time there wasn’t even a slightest protest but a very deep moan. Victory?
Pyrrhic. Right after we’ve changed the position her old self came back within seconds, she pushed me back and told me that “this wasn’t going to happen today”. And that was it. Just when I started to enjoy the sex.
Only women are capable of withdrawing consent mid-sex. For men it’s just impossible – once we’re in, we’re in.
In the morning she jokingly referred to the night that “almost nothing happened” and of course rejected any advances. Once again she was dead set on not having sex.
I realized that she’s making me wait on purpose. It wasn’t one of those cases where she was worried about buyer’s remorse. She was using the sex as a bargaining chip and I don’t like that. No one likes that.
Iron Rule of Tomassi #3 – “Any woman who makes you wait for sex, or by her actions implies she is making you wait for sex; the sex is NEVER worth the wait.”
It was clear that even if she one day decided to have sex with me it wouldn’t be the wild, primal sex I enjoy. It would be calculated, cold and boring. Meh.
While I was preparing the breakfast I made her make me a tea and she couldn’t figure out how to use a tea infuser. That settled it. She was not only boring but also dumb. Funny, entertaining but basic and stupid. Add to that unwillingness to have sex and you’ve got a girl that has absolutely nothing to offer beside her great looks.
Needless to say I’ve never contacted her again. And that’s the story of the worst daygame lay I’ve ever had.