Quality And Quantity (More Action Saga)
I’ve spent half of this year on doing more approaches under not so unreasonable assumption that more approaches will result in more lays. So far the experiment has led to surprising conclusions.
Before I dive into the data I want to share one particular idea that occurred to me during last months. It’s far from groundbreaking but it’s worth repeating over and over if not for your stubborn friends then for yourself: approaching more girls yields better results. Not only in terms of dates, lays and relationships. You’ll get better reactions, girls will be more open and everything should be easier. Not only because of experience but because of openness, high momentum and enjoyment that follows.
More quantity isn’t about approaching every breathing girl out there. It’s about acting on every cue, whim and IOI. If you considered approaching the girl even for a brief moment – do it. Find out why.
Trusting that your mind notices attractive girls and acting instead of thinking makes you more real. You’re no longer the guy who considered approaching a girl then went after her to “open”, “stack”, “vibe” and “get a number”. You just “pick up girls”. And you chat with a lot of them regardless of your imaginary chances for a new lay or whether she is a LTR material or just a potential fuck friend. It’s just what you do.
What “more approaching” does for your mindset is it makes you more open, act faster and in the end – be more attractive. You’ll become the guy that goes after every look a nice girl sends your way. A guy that runs to a girl just to find out if she’s really that hot. And ultimately – a guy who always goes after who he wants. Even if he usually gets blown out.
Conversely – approaching less and focusing on “sniping” girls will make you more of a weirdo creepy guy that has success only with very specific types of birds: the yes girls that fancy you no matter what. You can become an expert in spotting them and – because you’ll always be in similar circumstances – you’ll do very good with them. It’s not bad but that’s not what I’m trying to achieve.
Being a womanizer isn’t about having a niche. It’s about being able to seduce girls in different scenarios. I’m not saying you have to be universal (nightgame is still not my piece of cake) but widening your range won’t do you any harm. Unless of course you go after fatties or spam approach without noticing your mistakes.
The more you act on a whim, the nicer girls you get. I’m not using the word “hotter” as it’s not the case. We all can spot crazy stunner or a posh chick after countless surgeries from a mile away. I’m talking about girls that you personally enjoy. They are usually in 7-8 range but you get along with them extremely good and/or they have specific features you’re looking for. Arguing that “she wasn’t hot enough” is stupid when you’ve turned your head after her twice.
Back to the more action saga. So far I’ve done roughly the same number of approaches as in the same time in 2015 albeit in less sarging days. I’m more efficient: going out less often but approaching more per session. Then I have more numbers out of those approaches (my street game is at its best) but – surprise, surprise – less dates. Dates however are much better – girls that come to them are in fact interested in either sleeping with me or in a relationship.
Losing girls between getting the number and setting up a date it’s usually a symptom of weak game (too much/not enough of either attraction and/or rapport) or really bad text game (which is never a factor if you’re solid on the streets).
So where’s the “more action” mindset? I’m more in the moment, acting rapidly and doing more approaches… per session. It’s summer time and there are lot of other things to do, hence I’m not out 6 days a week anymore. More like 4 to 5 days and the sessions are shorter. “More action” is not letting a cute smile go past me. It’s “let’s find out” thought whenever I’m in doubt. And it’s working great.
As for the lays – yes, overall I’ve slept with more girls than in the first half of 2015 (out of less dates!). My aggressive (r-selected) approach works so that when a girl is interested in me she the sex is on the table. The biggest question right now is whether I can fix the numbers to dates ratio or… do I really need to.
The way I see it right now: given my 2500 approaches I’m extremely skilled in closing girls during the day. However, some of the girls I close agree to meet in the moment, especially if I’m in the zone. After few days the rush is gone and they don’t even remember why they gave me their number or my womanizing nature becomes evident and they don’t want anything to do with that. But if I really want adventure sex and having multiple fuck friends then losing girls mostly interested in romance isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Though it sure as hell would be nice to convince them to have some more fun with me before settling down. I’ll take care of that soon.
I’ve already was below the 50 approaches per lay landmark this year… for a brief moment. The surprising cascade of unfortunate events in regard to girls I’ve viewed as “100%” set me back a bit. Luck is a real factor, remember. But all that plus some really nice adventures both in Poland and abroad gave me a better perspective on what I want and who I am.
I’m more sure about the types of girls I enjoy spending my time with. I’m filtering more to learn about their wild side sooner. Some of the craziest things this year happened with shy girls that I knew were crazy… when no one was looking. On the other hand I’m sure I’ve missed few opportunities where being more boyfriendish or patient would mean success. Just last weekend I’ve told a girl I’ve been dating that I don’t believe in anyone “not having time to reply” and went nuclear on her. On the date she was super on but I don’t need to put up with girls unable to confirm the date that they proposed in the first place.
But if we are comparing the end results – I’m getting better. It might be for all the different reasons than those laid out above but the progress is evident. If anyone still thinks that picking up and seducing girls isn’t a skill set to be learned is dead wrong. Learn it intelligently – go after a lot of girls (quantity) that you personally like (quality), learn from your successes and mistakes, apply the new knowledge and you should be fine.