Attraction Basics: Style, Part Two – Accessories
I’ve been met with many positive reactions when I posted about clothes and style in this Attraction Basics series. The rules were really basic, simple to remember and applicable by virtually anyone. To sum them up – dress in fitted, color matching clothes, wear good shoes and avoid round necked t-shirts (or even worse – “funny” t-shirts). Find your style (you can start here) and then buy clothes that compliment your choice.
Think before you put something on and look in the mirror before leaving your home.
That will get you ahead of most men and definitely will help you feel better (which in turn translates to a better vibe). However, you won’t be immediately noticeable by women nor they’ll throw themselves at you. They’ll just see that you dress well. Not “great” but “well”. And that’s already something – you’ll get more positive reactions but not necessarily more IOIs.
Good, not great – few of my summer outfits. Still better than most guys.
There is a big difference between dressing “well” and dressing “great”. What really stands out on the streets is the congruent, confident look where every single item is worn just right and fits perfectly. But that’s not all – when it is done properly it also delivers a message, communicates some qualities about a man. You can use that – play on stereotypes, make people guess who you are just by looking at you.
When I’ve introduced that idea to couple of my friends they said that color wheel, fitted clothes and having a style was ok but this is stupid and too much of a mumbo jumbo. But is it? When you see a guy in a studded leather jacket with black colored long hair and heavy boots won’t you assume he’s a member of a certain group? And that there are qualities predominantly present within that group?
If you can make people associate some qualities with you just by the way you dress then why wouldn’t you use that? We all know what’s connected with dressing in suits or blazers/jackets and why more often than not is considered providerish. But most people stops there. However, sturdy leather boots, jeans, leather jacket and flannel shirt screams “cafe racer style” – motorbikes, adventure, adrenaline, etc. Tight t-shirts or even tank tops, nice sunglasses, tan, jacked figure – “I work out, I am dedicated and looks are important to me”. Any time you notice someone on the street – be it a man or a woman – stop for a second and think “what’s the message there”. Because usually there is one and its projected consciously.
These are just outfits. However, the main topic of this post are accessories. You can modify any good style into a great one by incorporating some extras. You dress in shirts but have a visible tattoo, some pendants hanging around your neck and a leather bracelet? That’s the “I’m a bad boy with a good job” message. Or maybe you dress in a bright colors but also sport a big diving watch and dog tags? Or maybe you’ve decided that your hands and arms look too plain for you and decided to wear some metal and leather on them?
Left: with/without jewelery. Right: a great combo of Henley + pendants.
Sky is the limit. As you can see in the pictures above there’s a big difference between my hands with and without rings/bracelet. And these are just plain tungsten ones, you can opt for more stylish. Since I’ve started to wear those I’ve been asked about them many times and heard even more comments. Girls do notice that. Same goes for pendants – things hanging around your neck usually draws some attention. Not many guys wear any jewelry at all and even a single item makes you stand out. You’ll be more interesting, at least in the very beginning.
The first time I’ve worn two of those pendants I was on a late daygame (gutter game) with sharkk and we were in fact discussing accessories. He’s sense of style is way above mine and I remember him saying a very important thing – to have a story behind your jewelry. It will be easier later on as you’ll just acquire more personal items but in the beginning just make something up. Two bars later he opened a set and one minute into the conversation the girls started to grab our pendants and ask questions about them. Big “I told you so” was in place.
Accessories, style, clothes – those will never be the deciding factor. However, they can make you appear more interesting which helps you to actually do your work (that is – seduce).
Accessories aren’t limited to the things you put on your fingers, arms and neck. What I haven’t realized there are few pieces of clothing that can be considered accessories by themselves. Take shoes for example. Vans or Converse All Stars are not only shoes but they’re timeless classics. You can’t go wrong with those and they’re much more defining than generic shoes. Same goes for shades – think some Bollé/ESS shooting sunglasses or Oakleys. Once again we’re in that shady territory of “what message you’re projecting with your clothes”.
But it doesn’t end there. Graphics on t-shirts are yet another thing. I usually wear just colors. But I’ve started to experiment with different graphics and I found out it’s not only useful to break the pattern but it’s also fun. I’ve bought quite a few v-necked t-shirts and Henleys with American symbols on them (flags, stripes, eagles). People started to notice the pattern. “What’s with you and the US?” they asked (because America, fuck yeah!). So they do notice and you can project a message that way too. Just don’t wear those ugly “funny” t-shirts.
Always be congruent in your clothing. If one day you’re wearing dog tags and t-shirt with a M16 and the next you’re rocking the peace symbol something is not right.
I’m no expert on clothes and style. I’m learning it like everyone else is. But as in daygame you have to experiment and see what fits you and what you can pull off. It’s good to follow some fashion blogs or Twitter accounts (run by men for men) and every now and then change a little bit. I’m sure I’ll write another post about clothes soon, maybe even this year. Not because I’ve already have the knowledge today but because I’ll try new things and report back on what’s working best. Until that time I strongly recommend toying with some accessories.