Building A Lifestyle Is Not Enough

Let’s once again be brutally honest. You can have most exhilarating and exciting life, money, looks, fascinating hobbies, successful career and all that stuff. You know what you still wouldn’t have? Women (unless you exploit being famous).

The truth is that no women will pick you up. It’s the man’s thing and it need to be initiated and done by the man. And I could end it right here but there was a story that prompted me to write this post.

A former daygamer recently went onto enjoying his life. He found a new hobby and went back to another one. Then he became passionate about the new one. Then  he swore that no weekend would he waste at home and he did exactly that. He traveled, partied and had successful few months. Do you know how many women he’d met? None.

Well of course if you’re into knitting and yoga then maybe you will meet some hot chicks doing that stuff but most guys have hobbies that attract no women (well, none that are interesting). And it’s ok. I’d rather be playing some instruments, diving or skydiving, riding a motorbike, running, working out, climbing, traveling, playing on the stock market, learning a martial art or a new language or whatever the hell I want instead of pursuing a hobby against my will just to meet women.

Why “against my will”? Cause most women are ambitionless while men are into demanding things. Sad, but true. Girls aren’t running races (i.e. for a result), they’re just jogging. They are not traveling, they’re on a vacation. They don’t like to get dirty nor tired. The just want an easy life where everything just magically happens to them. Men want to achieve goals, break the barriers, conquer. Women – not so much.

After hundreds of dates and few years spent on upgrading myself and my life I found out that I live more exciting life than most of the girls. Some of them literally said this – “it doesn’t really happen that much in my life”. And I’m not that thrilling at all! Few exciting hobbies, lots of sports, some travel here and there, my work and my social circles. That’s it. But I’m dedicated to using every single minute of my time to achieve my goals. I’m passionate about things and that leads to sucess and some really good stories. Girls on the other hand don’t have goals. They just don’t have ambition nor passion (try asking girls about her hobbies and then about which one is her passion, which drives her life).

The usual disclaimer: there are exceptions to every rule but this is a post about general rules. And women – in general – won’t be found anywhere around guys doing cool stuff.

Now you can say that both me and my friend’s experiences are anecdotal evidence. That we are socially handicapped and that’s why there are no girls around us. That there are some girls that have  nice hobbies and do more with their life than just hanging around. That can be true and there are those rare interesting girls which occasionally can drag along their girlfriends. It’s not like it’s a no woman’s land. I’m just saying two things. First: males are far more likely to be found doing interesting things hence there will always be shortage of women doing those things.

The second is far more important: even if there are nice girls hanging around they won’t approach you. It’s still your job to have the balls, the knowledge and the vibe to approach and pick up a girl.

It’s not like you ever witnessed any cute girl ever threw herself at an unknown guy, let alone asked a man out. And you can say what you want but it’s just the way the world works. Girls can give you hints, IOIs if you want to call them but it’s all up to you.

Realize that no matter what you do in your life you still need to approach to meet girls. Be it in the club or a bar or in that indoor climbing venue or on the streets on your way to the gym. I’m all for daygame as I found that’s the fastest easiest way to find the women I really like. I won’t meet anyone riding a bike, playing an instrument, training or cooking. However, I can meet lot of girls by just taking a long walk home from work.

And the guy who was so much enjoying his life? Well he’s once again daygaming. His adventures are entertaining and he surely grows as a person but as expected – he won’t find women there, so he added one more thing to his schedule.

Which I strongly advise you do too.


Male-female relationships commentator. Also a traveler, adrenaline junkie and, believe it or not, introvert. Still obsessed with working out, coaching daygame and living life to the full.

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