I’ve Made 1000 Daygame Approaches
This supposed to be a two-part post describing my daygame journey so far. However, lately I’ve managed to do over 100 approaches in single month (part 1) and break the 1000 barrier (part 2) at the same time. So let’s to this in a single post.
Before you start: this is not another London-based PUA blog. I live in Poland, speak polish and pick up polish girls.
The history is pretty standard: my first relationship started when I was eighteen and lasted a bit too long (nearly seven years). I was almost 26 when it ended. Somehow I’ve managed to get another girlfriend. She was six years older but this time I ended it after just few months. I was 26,5 had two girls and little experience. It’s funny how much you can learn from your past relationships… when you know what to look for.
I’ve learned much about sex (many years with one partner? you really try some stuff), attraction (second girl was much more into me than I was into her; in work environment I was confident as hell cause I knew what I was doing and have done it for years), passion (I’ve been sleeping with the second one after we broke up) and power of denying (saying “no” to a girl who is into you).
Still, I was hopeless with girls. Shy, nervous, clueless. What was worse – I was socially handicapped. Summer 2013 I traveled to another city and realised I’ve been afraid to talk to strangers. I checked my smartphone for directions being unable to ask people. It was a turning point. I couldn’t live like that any longer.
I’ve stumbled upon approachanxiety.com – beautiful site describing one man struggle against AA. I’ve started to do his little steps: practice eye contact, smile, say hello to strangers, ask them directions. I was cured from inability to talk to strangers in one short month. Then I was able to get random girls to smile at me using only my presence. My first indirect approach was a two-set at river banks that lasted over one hour! I knew it was possible for me to change.
Best thing ever that happened to me next was the discovery of daygame.com and then: sashapua.com, krauserpua.com (and in 2014 I’ve also started reading tomtorero.com, authenticpua.com if you’re interested in my “mentors”). I thought to myself: if they can do it – I can do it!
First daygame approach with a Yad stop ended in a number close! Boom! Massive confidence boost, but AA was still there. Sometimes it was hours just so I could make my one approach for the day. But I’ve pushed myself as I always did.
Understanding basics of street interactions took me between 200 and 300 approaches. After that I started to get a number every 4-5 approaches. Cool, huh? At first it was great – had many day twos, managed to get few girls home. Not everything was easy. I had some pretty bad dates and tens of missed opportunities but those were with girls that I was really into! Compare that to my previous years!
I learned a lot. At the beginning of my journey I probably wouldn’t belive that you can kiss close a girl who said “no” to your attempts… six times. And the seventh was a passionate kiss from her side! Girls were dating me (January 2014 – 12 dates with 8 different girls), it was exciting. My reality was slowly shattering.
First proper close from daygame came (see what I did there?) after 7 months and 400 approaches. It wasn’t a turning point. Things don’t just change there is massive amount of work and pain preceding each success.
Then I felt for the next girl, stopped doing daygame (except for showing off)… And as you can guess it ended how it usually ends. She ended whole thing and I was back on the daygame wagon.
I’ve struggled during next months – many numbers, few dates, most of them went nowhere. About 150 approaches till the next lay. Reality was slowly shifting the right way. This girl had a boyfriend but she just wanted a good fuck. I can really say I gamed her – without skill set and experience I couldn’t ever sleep with her like I did. And I’ve even managed to keep her around for a few weeks. Cool!
Have you ever heard that daygame is life changing? Yeah – it is. I’ve changed my wardrobe, started to go to clubs (do things you are afraid of!) and started to travel. Mind you I was already working out and in a good shape (and shaved my long hair just before my 2nd girlfriend). But if I haven’t done all that – I definitely would do so at this point. BTW I’m not jacked but I’m definitely not fat and girls notice that I do train. I also was learning how to play drums (which I wanted to do since I was a kid). All that can be described as “do things that you’ve always wanted and/or was too scared to try”. Daygame changes you – you start to take chances and… well… “grab your life by the horns”. And suddenly you don’t even have to DHV during the day twos/threes/ns – you just have really interesting life.
But there were not that many dates. I started to record my interactions. This gave me some clues but the words were ok. It must have been nonverbals. I tried Krauser way, I tried to be more sexual (no clue how to do that – sometimes you are just blind and only fellow daygamers can help). But I always kept pushing. I got some help from few guys that were daygaming in the same area but still – no single turning point, just small steps. Even lays that happen weren’t that big of a deal.
Next small step was a bounceback (which unfortunately went only halfway – if-you-know-what-I-mean). Until that point I always set up day three or four at my place. Well, this time I’ve managed to bounce back straight from day two into my apartment. (Oh, I had two bouncebacks in 2013 but they were carefully planned and cunningly executed, nothing like that one.). I’ve managed to pull another bounceback same month. And then another… It helped with my confidence, even if they went nowhere.
And the next (last so far) big leap happened last month. Instant dates. Boom! Another crack in my reality, another confidence boost. I’m still not as good in “idating” as I’d like but things were changing. There is difference between “yeah, I know it can be done” and “yes, I can do this”!
I always thought change was bad. But change is good. It is exciting and it spawns… new changes. Which are exciting, welcome and give you new ideas for changes. And so on – you keep on going, keep on learning and trying new things. All for the better. Changes are good.
So where I am now? Last month’s stats were: 109 approaches, 32 contact details, 13 dates with 9 different girls. Not good enough? Of course! But when I think that I’ve managed to date/see 50 attractive girls so far (in 2014) and I slept with 7 of them (again – in 2014; daygame only) there is really no comparison to my pre-daygame life (2 girls 1986-2013).
I was hoping for 12 lays this year from daygame alone. I might not get them. But the journey gives you much more than lays. I’m talking about wonderful times, beautiful and interesting girls and the thing that matter the most – change that happen to you. My co-workers, friends and family all noticed that I’m much much happier. And I am. This is the best time in my life. I’ve never felt better.
This is the story of both my last month and my last 1000 approaches. I will keep on posting things that might be helpful to you. Cause I’m just like you. Not some PUA expert level that gets more than 30 girls a year. But fear not. I will get there and I will share with you how to do that.